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Post by Ben Lomond on May 16, 2009 10:26:16 GMT
Got these one liners in my E mail the other day. Some of them raised a smile.
I had a mate who was suicidal. He was really depressed, so I pushed him in front of a steam train. He was chuffed to bits. > I met a 14 year old girl on the internet. She was clever, funny, flirty and sexy, so I suggested we meet up. She turned out to be an undercover detective. How cool is that at her age?!
I went to see the nurse this morning for my annual check-up. She said I had to stop w*nking. When I asked why she said, "Because I'm trying to examine you!" I just saw that Harry Potter film. A bit unrealistic if you ask me. I mean, a ginger kid, with two friends? When I got divorced, my wife said she would fight for custody of the kids. Took her out with one punch!!
My granddad gave me some sound advice on his deathbed. "It's worth spending money on good speakers," he told me.
I was walking in a cemetery this morning and saw a bloke hiding behind a gravestone. "Morning." , I said. "No, " he replied, "just having a sh!t."
Disabled toilets! Ironically, the only toilets big enough to run around in. How sick is that?
I was reading in the paper today about this dwarf whot got pick pocketed on the underground. How could anyone stoop so low?
I was walking down the road when I saw an Afghan bloke standing on a balcony shaking a carpet. "What's up Abdul," I shouted, " won't it start?"
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Post by Alpha Hooligan on May 16, 2009 11:12:37 GMT
I went to see the nurse this morning for my annual check-up. She said I had to stop w*nking. When I asked why she said, "Because I'm trying to examine you!"
hahahaha! That is funny! ;D
AH
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